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BFB
Restricted Member
| Joined: | 21 Sep 2008 |
| Location: | USA |
| Posts: | 34 |
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Posted: 22 Sep 2008 03:58 am |
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My sincere hope is that everyone here trying to lose weight has unlimited success. Unfortunately that is not going to happen. The fact is 98% of you will fail. Then what will you do? Feel badly about it? Feel like a failure? Put yourself down? Beat yourself up? Then repeat the process and continue the cycle? I am not telling anyone to give up. I would encourage you to lose weight because if you do you will be physically healthier. I can't help you lose weight. 1000's of diet books have been written and none of them have worked. The weight loss failure rate has not improved.
Let me spell it out. There is no valid reason why anyone who is fat bodied cannot lose excess weight and keep it off. There is no can't. 2/3 of Americans are fat not because they can't be slim. 67% of Americans are fat bodied because they won't comply with the behaviors required for weight loss and optimal health.
If you are like most fat bodied Americans, you are a weak-willed glutton. That is what I am. The difference between me, them and you is I admit. On my blog I embrace hedonism and gluttony. I let people know that body image and self image are two different things. My blog is a soft place for you to fall. Again, I wish you all weight loss success but chances are most of you won't reach your goal. If you can find something more important to you than food you will lose weight. The fact is food is great stuff and life is not that great. Come join the gluttony, debauchery, gormandizing and hedonism at BFB.
By Roberta Temes, PhD
Did you know that the idea of a fat person having low self esteem is a myth? Humans come in various shapes and sizes. Every psychological test given to overweight people indicates that if you are fat you are as mentally healthy, or unhealthy, as anyone in the general population. There is nothing about overeating that is associated with poor emotional health. In fact, it is possible that obese people are emotionally stronger than slim people
There was a time, right here in the USA, when only the most successful folks were heavy and everyone else tried to emulate them. Large bodies were proof of robust health and substantial wealth. But, in America in the 21st century fat is out, thin is in.
Obesity is in no way a psychological disorder. Obesity is not an eating disorder. Fat people have a genetic predisposition to gain weight and if they wish to conform to today's ideal of slimness and if they want to maintain good health, they must counteract their inborn biological impulses. This is possible. Difficult, but possible. Particularly possible if you have a diet buddy or buddies. because many slim folks who were interviewed said they'd stay at home if they were obese.. they would not have the psychological fortitude to be seen in public if they were heavy.
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suenos
Distinguished Member
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Posted: 22 Sep 2008 01:29 pm |
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IF YOU FAIL AND ARE TIRED OF FEELING LIKE #%@&!.....
You, like most fat bodied Americans are not a weak willed glutton.
If you are like most Americans, fat, thin, or in-between you are probably busy, hold one or more jobs, which you somehow successfully juggle along with educational pursuits, caring for families, and meeting social obligations. Chances are your job is probably more sedentary than not and you have a basic form of transportation and everyday conveniences of living that do not require a lot of physical effort. And there?óÔé¼Ôäós the daily reality that it?óÔé¼Ôäós usually less economical (in terms of both money and time) to form the majority of your meals from fresh, non-processed foods which are usually naturally lower in calories than quickly prepared, easily accessed high calorie processed foods. And like pretty much every society on the face of the earth, there?óÔé¼Ôäós the fact that almost every social event, family celebration and national holiday revolves around ?óÔé¼?ôspecial foods?óÔé¼?Ø.
If you are like most people stuggling to lose/maintain a weight loss, keep in mind that you are simply one person doing the best he/she can in often difficult circumstances, making mistakes along the way, learning from those mistakes and moving on ?óÔé¼ÔÇ£ always striving to do better, increase knowledge and eventually WILL find a way to make changes that work for you through trial and error. Maybe not the first time, or the second or even third time ?óÔé¼ÔÇ£ but IMO, only effort begets success. If you give up then, yea, you?óÔé¼Ôäóre not going to succeed because you?óÔé¼Ôäóve taken yourself out of the running to succeed.
BODY IMAGE AND SELF IMAGE ARE USUALLY INTERTWINED
I think when you feel good about your body ?óÔé¼ÔÇ£ regardless of it?óÔé¼Ôäós shape or size, then those good feelings overflow into how you feel about your self?óÔé¼?ª.and when you feel bad about your self, those bad feelings overflow into how you feel about your body ?óÔé¼ÔÇ£ regardless of it?óÔé¼Ôäós shape or size. Our bodies, big, small, "perfect" or "odd" are ultimate gifts we can learn to love independent of the number on the scale, caliper or tape measure. I also think the best way to feel good about your body ?óÔé¼ÔÇ£ regardless of it?óÔé¼Ôäós shape or size ?óÔé¼ÔÇ£ it simply to take care of it and appreciate (appearances aside) the truly wonderful things it can do.
Food is great stuff and it's just one of the wonderful parts of life itself.
?óÔé¼?ªand life is often how you chose to view it and what you chose to make of it. If it?óÔé¼Ôäós not great, then do what you gotta do to make it great?óÔé¼?ªcause you?óÔé¼Ôäóve only got the one.
"Come join the gluttony, debauchery, gormandizing and hedonism at BFB."
You know, I don?óÔé¼Ôäót think I will. I don't want a soft place to land and give up when I fall...I want to fall firmly on my rear end, go "whoops that was a little painful...what can I do now to improve my chances of reaching my destination the next time without bruising my butt like that?"
Cause I can?óÔé¼Ôäót imagine how wallowing in a view of ?óÔé¼?ôlife sucks and maintaining a healthy body and improving my life circumstances are too hard so instead I?óÔé¼Ôäóll just give right the heck up on even making the effort and stuff my face instead?óÔé¼?Ø will in any way, shape or form be helpful to me or the people around me.
Good luck with your blog.
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CrimsonAnimus
Distinguished Member
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Posted: 22 Sep 2008 02:51 pm |
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The fact is 98% of you will fail.
This statistic is incorrect. Actually, 100% of us will fail, at one point or another. Many of us, though, will get up and keep going. That is what it means to lose weight. A journey to lose weight is like a journey to the end of the world. You don't start at one point and end at another, but rather, the journey continues indefinitely.
2/3 of Americans are fat not because they can't be slim. 67% of Americans are fat bodied because they won't comply with the behaviors required for weight loss and optimal health.
According to the CDC, 34% of Americans are obese. Over 99% of them are obese because they lack the willpower to change it at this point in their lives. While a healthy diet and an active lifestyle are important, neither of these factors are the true key to breaking the cycle of obesity. Rather, long-term success will only come when you have searched within yourself to find out why you are truly obese, and take steps to correct it.
If you are like most fat bodied Americans, you are a weak-willed glutton. That is what I am. The difference between me, them and you is I admit.
Let's take a moment to define the word "glutton":
A person who eats and drinks excessively or voraciously.
OK, I will admit it. I am a glutton. I will also state that I know many gluttons who are not overweight at all. What is the difference? Genetics? Yes, that is certainly a factor, but only one of many.
There is a profound difference between loving to eat and allowing food to dominate you. As someone who was obese for most of his life, I will tell you that I did allow food to dominate me. It was my comfort - my greatest outlet. No matter how low I felt, eating food gave me a level of comfort that I still have yet to find otherwise.
Despite still not having found a different outlet, I have broken the cycle of obesity, and I will not go back. I still love food. That will never change. I am not going to deceive myself by saying food is just not that important to me anymore. It will ALWAYS be important.
However, I have other things in my life that are important, too. It's hard to spend quality time with my family when I don't even feel like going up the stairs. It's nice to be able to go out and see a movie without the absolute need to eat dinner out, too, every single time. It's nice to know that I will be able to fit into a roller coaster seat without severe pain. It's also nice to know that I can sit down in most chairs without fear of them breaking. These are things that many people take for granted.
Did you know that the idea of a fat person having low self esteem is a myth?
Yes, I know that. Low self-esteem is attributed to so many factors. Body image is only one of them. There are plenty of thin people who have low self-esteem.
Every psychological test given to overweight people indicates that if you are fat you are as mentally healthy, or unhealthy as anyone in the general population.
Obesity is associated with a variety of mental health conditions, such as dementia. It is more than just physical.
But, in America in the 21st century fat is out, thin is in.
Any society's view on being overweight is largely cultural. Further, we all have individual preferences for what we consider to be attractive. This does not change the health aspect.
I feel sorry for you, because I have been where you are, and could easily have ended up with the same mentality as you, eventually. Life is too short to be unhappy, but is this really the legacy that you want to leave behind? I want to leave this world knowing that I made a difference, not engaged in an endless cycle of consumption.
I wish you happiness.
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BFB
Restricted Member
| Joined: | 21 Sep 2008 |
| Location: | USA |
| Posts: | 34 |
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Posted: 22 Sep 2008 03:51 pm |
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CrimsonAnimus wrote: The fact is 98% of you will fail.
This statistic is incorrect. Actually, 100% of us will fail, at one point or another. Many of us, though, will get up and keep going. That is what it means to lose weight. A journey to lose weight is like a journey to the end of the world. You don't start at one point and end at another, but rather, the journey continues indefinitely.
2/3 of Americans are fat not because they can't be slim. 67% of Americans are fat bodied because they won't comply with the behaviors required for weight loss and optimal health.
According to the CDC, 34% of Americans are obese. Over 99% of them are obese because they lack the willpower to change it at this point in their lives. While a healthy diet and an active lifestyle are important, neither of these factors are the true key to breaking the cycle of obesity. Rather, long-term success will only come when you have searched within yourself to find out why you are truly obese, and take steps to correct it.
If you are like most fat bodied Americans, you are a weak-willed glutton. That is what I am. The difference between me, them and you is I admit.
Let's take a moment to define the word "glutton":
A person who eats and drinks excessively or voraciously.
OK, I will admit it. I am a glutton. I will also state that I know many gluttons who are not overweight at all. What is the difference? Genetics? Yes, that is certainly a factor, but only one of many.
There is a profound difference between loving to eat and allowing food to dominate you. As someone who was obese for most of his life, I will tell you that I did allow food to dominate me. It was my comfort - my greatest outlet. No matter how low I felt, eating food gave me a level of comfort that I still have yet to find otherwise.
Despite still not having found a different outlet, I have broken the cycle of obesity, and I will not go back. I still love food. That will never change. I am not going to deceive myself by saying food is just not that important to me anymore. It will ALWAYS be important.
However, I have other things in my life that are important, too. It's hard to spend quality time with my family when I don't even feel like going up the stairs. It's nice to be able to go out and see a movie without the absolute need to eat dinner out, too, every single time. It's nice to know that I will be able to fit into a roller coaster seat without severe pain. It's also nice to know that I can sit down in most chairs without fear of them breaking. These are things that many people take for granted.
Did you know that the idea of a fat person having low self esteem is a myth?
Yes, I know that. Low self-esteem is attributed to so many factors. Body image is only one of them. There are plenty of thin people who have low self-esteem.
Every psychological test given to overweight people indicates that if you are fat you are as mentally healthy, or unhealthy as anyone in the general population.
Obesity is associated with a variety of mental health conditions, such as dementia. It is more than just physical.
But, in America in the 21st century fat is out, thin is in.
Any society's view on being overweight is largely cultural. Further, we all have individual preferences for what we consider to be attractive. This does not change the health aspect.
I feel sorry for you, because I have been where you are, and could easily have ended up with the same mentality as you, eventually. Life is too short to be unhappy, but is this really the legacy that you want to leave behind? I want to leave this world knowing that I made a difference, not engaged in an endless cycle of consumption.
I wish you happiness.
Let's break down the excuses and rationalization people who hate their fat bodies but are unwilling to eat the amount of calories required to stay at an optimally healthy weight make. There are no valid reasons why a person cannot maintain weight. Unlike others in the fat acceptance movement and other fat bodied Americans. BFB is not going to make excuses or lie about why people become fat bodied. Humans become fat bodied for one reason and one reason only. We fail to comply with the behaviors required to maintain an optimal weight. At BFB we hare honest enough to admit that. Further we do not see gormandizing, hedonism and gluttony as a moral failing. We contend that obesity is a legitimate lifestyle choice and we actively promote what many self righteous people would call gluttony.
I totally understand where you are coming from. You chose a different path and that is fine. My path is a path of least resistance and constant pleasure. Life should NOT be a journey to the grave with the intention of arriving safely in an attractive and well preserved body, but rather to skid in sideways - Chardonnay in one hand - chocolate in the other - body thoroughly used up, totally worn out and screaming 'WOO HOO, What a Ride. I would hope that fat bodied people would admit that instead of beating themselves up for being weak and having less self control that the 1/3 of Americans who are perahps a bit more responsible.
I posted this on a diet forum so that people would think about what they are doing. Beating your self up and making dishonest excuses about why their diets have stalled is no way to live IMO. Anyone CAN lose weight and keep it off. Deep down most people don't really want that. Food wins most of the time. Why fight it?
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BFB
Restricted Member
| Joined: | 21 Sep 2008 |
| Location: | USA |
| Posts: | 34 |
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Posted: 22 Sep 2008 04:15 pm |
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suenos wrote: IF YOU FAIL AND ARE TIRED OF FEELING LIKE #%@&!.....
You, like most fat bodied Americans are not a weak willed glutton.
If you are like most Americans, fat, thin, or in-between you are probably busy, hold one or more jobs, which you somehow successfully juggle along with educational pursuits, caring for families, and meeting social obligations. Chances are your job is probably more sedentary than not and you have a basic form of transportation and everyday conveniences of living that do not require a lot of physical effort. And there?óÔé¼Ôäós the daily reality that it?óÔé¼Ôäós usually less economical (in terms of both money and time) to form the majority of your meals from fresh, non-processed foods which are usually naturally lower in calories than quickly prepared, easily accessed high calorie processed foods. And like pretty much every society on the face of the earth, there?óÔé¼Ôäós the fact that almost every social event, family celebration and national holiday revolves around ?óÔé¼?ôspecial foods?óÔé¼?Ø.
I have heard the "I am too busy not to be fat bodied excuse." It is a dishonest cop out. It is pure laziness. There are plenty of convenient low calorie foods available. Again, it is not a matter of can't. It is a matter of won't. Again, food wins! Yeah FOOD!
If you are like most people stuggling to lose/maintain a weight loss, keep in mind that you are simply one person doing the best he/she can in often difficult circumstances, making mistakes along the way, learning from those mistakes and moving on ?óÔé¼ÔÇ£ always striving to do better, increase knowledge and eventually WILL find a way to make changes that work for you through trial and error. Maybe not the first time, or the second or even third time ?óÔé¼ÔÇ£ but IMO, only effort begets success. If you give up then, yea, you?óÔé¼Ôäóre not going to succeed because you?óÔé¼Ôäóve taken yourself out of the running to succeed.
That is more BS! Here is the thermodynamic reality. It is an undisputable reality that the most weight a woman can maintain on 2000 calories per day is 140 pounds and then she would need to be in a coma. If a man eats 2500 calories per day the most he can weigh is 160 pounds. There is no reason why men an women cannot eat that amount of calories respectively everyday. The "I don't have time to exercise" excuse is a pathetic lie. If I wanted to lose weight I could do it but I would not be happy doing it. It would be unpleasant. I would miss all the yummy food.
BODY IMAGE AND SELF IMAGE ARE USUALLY INTERTWINED
I think when you feel good about your body ?óÔé¼ÔÇ£ regardless of it?óÔé¼Ôäós shape or size, then those good feelings overflow into how you feel about your self?óÔé¼?ª.and when you feel bad about your self, those bad feelings overflow into how you feel about your body ?óÔé¼ÔÇ£ regardless of it?óÔé¼Ôäós shape or size. Our bodies, big, small, "perfect" or "odd" are ultimate gifts we can learn to love independent of the number on the scale, caliper or tape measure. I also think the best way to feel good about your body ?óÔé¼ÔÇ£ regardless of it?óÔé¼Ôäós shape or size ?óÔé¼ÔÇ£ it simply to take care of it and appreciate (appearances aside) the truly wonderful things it can do.
It is the goal of BFB to get people to make the distinction between self image and body image. The fact is fat bodied people have a better self image than the general population.
Food is great stuff and it's just one of the wonderful parts of life itself.
?óÔé¼?ªand life is often how you chose to view it and what you chose to make of it. If it?óÔé¼Ôäós not great, then do what you gotta do to make it great?óÔé¼?ªcause you?óÔé¼Ôäóve only got the one.
"Come join the gluttony, debauchery, gormandizing and hedonism at BFB."
You know, I don?óÔé¼Ôäót think I will. I don't want a soft place to land and give up when I fall...I want to fall firmly on my rear end, go "whoops that was a little painful...what can I do now to improve my chances of reaching my destination the next time without bruising my butt like that?"
Why?
Cause I can?óÔé¼Ôäót imagine how wallowing in a view of ?óÔé¼?ôlife sucks and maintaining a healthy body and improving my life circumstances are too hard so instead I?óÔé¼Ôäóll just give right the heck up on even making the effort and stuff my face instead?óÔé¼?Ø will in any way, shape or form be helpful to me or the people around me.
Every 6 seconds someone dies from malairia and starvation. Early modern human had horrble lives. Life sucks. I have never seen a smiling jogger but go to a barbecue and everyone is having a good time.
Good luck with your blog.
My Blog is doing well. I have gotten a great deal of flak from the fat acceptance feminists but surprisingly I have gotten many thumbs up from fitness forums who may strongly disagree but applaud us for our honesty. We are the honest voice of fat acceptance.
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CrimsonAnimus
Distinguished Member
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Posted: 22 Sep 2008 04:19 pm |
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Foods makes me happy, too. Some of my fondest memories include food, in one way or another.
However, there are many things in life that bring happiness. If you have yet to find them, then you are not looking hard enough, or perhaps you are unwilling to look.
There is nothing wrong with being happy with yourself, regardless of your size. However, by your own admission, obesity is a path of weakness. Giving up is so easy to do. If all of us gave up on life, though, we wouldn't even have any food to eat, because no one would be growing it, or preparing it.
In the end, it's a matter of priority. You have chosen food over life, and that is your choice to make. It comes at a heavy sacrifice, though. When your time is up, you will be able to say that you have eaten enough, but you will not be able to say that you had the quality of life that you could have.
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StuckSara
Distinguished Member
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Posted: 22 Sep 2008 04:24 pm |
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I posted this on a diet forum so that people would think about what they are doing. Beating your self up and making dishonest excuses about why their diets have stalled is no way to live IMO. Anyone CAN lose weight and keep it off. Deep down most people don't really want that. Food wins most of the time. Why fight it?
As a hedonist, you can understand that you have to subtract the pleasure you miss out on from the amount of pleasure you get from eatting. Being overweight can make a person miss out on a ton of enjoyable activities... being out of breath while trying to play a sport, or play with a child, having to go to the doctor all the time for things like high blood pressure or diabetes (which by the way also costs money that takes away from other enjoyable things we could be doing), not being able to ride the rollercoaster at the themepark because the seats are too narrow... these are all painful things that come along with eatting too much food. Subtract those kind of things from the limited amount of pleasure food gives, and you could definitely be in the negative... not worth it!
We are here because we have thought about what we are doing. We have subconsciously weighed the pleasure we get and lose from food, and decided to opt out of being overweight. We want that food because it's instant gratification. But in the long run it hurts us more than it helps.
Sure, skid into your grave sideways, but you can still do that while eatting a little less, and you'll have 20 extra years of pleasure!
Good luck BFB, but you're not for me... and I'm sure you won't get many supporters off this site!
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CrimsonAnimus
Distinguished Member
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Posted: 22 Sep 2008 04:26 pm |
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If a man eats 2500 calories per day the most he can weigh is 160 pounds.
Not true. I ate between 2500-3000 calories daily on average, and that brought me up to over 350 pounds. The food we eat is only one factor that influences our weight. Metabolism is a critical aspect, and this is influenced by genetics, what we eat, how often we eat, and our exercise level.
I will agree with you that saying, "I just can't lose weight - I've tried my best," is typically a copout. However, accepting obesity is an even bigger copout, because you are basically saying, "I could change, but there is no point." That is not reality, either.
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BFB
Restricted Member
| Joined: | 21 Sep 2008 |
| Location: | USA |
| Posts: | 34 |
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Posted: 22 Sep 2008 04:42 pm |
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CrimsonAnimus wrote: Foods makes me happy, too. Some of my fondest memories include food, in one way or another.
However, there are many things in life that bring happiness. If you have yet to find them, then you are not looking hard enough, or perhaps you are unwilling to look.
There is nothing wrong with being happy with yourself, regardless of your size. However, by your own admission, obesity is a path of weakness. Giving up is so easy to do. If all of us gave up on life, though, we wouldn't even have any food to eat, because no one would be growing it, or preparing it.
In the end, it's a matter of priority. You have chosen food over life, and that is your choice to make. It comes at a heavy sacrifice, though. When your time is up, you will be able to say that you have eaten enough, but you will not be able to say that you had the quality of life that you could have.
I would seem that most fat bodied people have not found anything better than food.
If obesity is a path of weakness so what? Fat bodied people are weak willed the difference between them and me is I am honest enough to admit. We are also quite selfish. The consequences of our obesity has profound negative effects on society, public health, national security, and our loved ones but given all that we still will not behave responsibly. Again, I admit it. I am not going to miss heaven by an inch I am going to miss it by a mile but perhaps my honesty will earn me a cold icecream sandwich while I roast in #%@&!.
You really cannot judge me. I know and I freely admit that I am a glutton. I make no apologies for that. The Levitical laws call to the death of us gluttons and wine bibers. Why should I struggle against my gluttonous nature? What is in it for me?
I have not chosen food over life. I have chosen selfishness and hedonism over responsibility. My life will be shorter but much more fun and a heck of a lot easier. AHHHHHHH the American Dream.... USA USA USA !
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BFB
Restricted Member
| Joined: | 21 Sep 2008 |
| Location: | USA |
| Posts: | 34 |
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Posted: 22 Sep 2008 04:57 pm |
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CrimsonAnimus wrote: If a man eats 2500 calories per day the most he can weigh is 160 pounds.
Not true. I ate between 2500-3000 calories daily on average, and that brought me up to over 350 pounds. The food we eat is only one factor that influences our weight. Metabolism is a critical aspect, and this is influenced by genetics, what we eat, how often we eat, and our exercise level.
I will agree with you that saying, "I just can't lose weight - I've tried my best," is typically a copout. However, accepting obesity is an even bigger copout, because you are basically saying, "I could change, but there is no point." That is not reality, either.
Give me a break! the most weight any man can maintain on 3000 calories a day is about 190 pounds. NO HUMAN BODY CAN DEFY THE LAWS OF PHYSICS! To reach 350 you had to be eating in the 7000 calorie per day range. That is an undeniable reality.
Here are the metabolic reality for a 190 pound male 50 years of age.- Resting (basal) metabolic rate: 1964 calories per day
- Typical daily activities: 982 calories per day
- Total calories burned: 2947 per day
I find it interesting that soooooo many people make such outrageous claims. WHat you are saying cannot possibly be true. I am sorry to say it and I am not trying to anger you but what you are claiming cannot be true.
The most a basal metabolic rate can very in individuals or the same weight, age and gender is about 35 calories per day. I tried that BS when I headed a major fat acceptance org. I was on a radio show and I got owned in a debate by a doctor. Do you really believe what you are saying?
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CrimsonAnimus
Distinguished Member
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Posted: 22 Sep 2008 05:39 pm |
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I'm not judging you. However, if you are going to come here and speak against the lifestyles that we have chosen, you really cannot expect any of us not to do the same against yours. The path you have chosen is a copout, and you acknowledge that. Most of us are not willing to go that route, because while we love food, we love other things, too. It's a personal choice.
Food intake is only one aspect of weight. It seems to me like you are trying to justify your own weight by saying that since you have an eating problem, every other overweight person does, too. It's not that simple.
I won't sit here and say that I didn't have an eating problem. Some days, I consumed higher than 2500-3000. Other days, it was lower. Regardless, my calories did not come from healthy food. Different food has different effects on your body. Some foods slow your metabolism, others quicken it. Yes, the absolute concept is that if your body burns less than you consume, you will gain weight. However, there are so many more factors at work besides the number of calories you are consuming.
If this was not the case, then everyone would have the same metabolism, and every two people that ate the same number of calories would be at the same weight - no exceptions. Obviously, this is not the case, and if you really believe that the variance is only 35 calories, then you must not leave your house very often.
Finally, I'm not angered, because I know why you are really here. It is to find justification that the path you have chosen is acceptable. Well, if you really need that justification, then I'm sure you already know the answer.
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BFB
Restricted Member
| Joined: | 21 Sep 2008 |
| Location: | USA |
| Posts: | 34 |
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Posted: 22 Sep 2008 06:10 pm |
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CrimsonAnimus wrote: I'm not judging you. However, if you are going to come here and speak against the lifestyles that we have chosen, you really cannot expect any of us not to do the same against yours. The path you have chosen is a copout, and you acknowledge that. Most of us are not willing to go that route, because while we love food, we love other things, too. It's a personal choice.
Food intake is only one aspect of weight. It seems to me like you are trying to justify your own weight by saying that since you have an eating problem, every other overweight person does, too. It's not that simple.
I won't sit here and say that I didn't have an eating problem. Some days, I consumed higher than 2500-3000. Other days, it was lower. Regardless, my calories did not come from healthy food. Different food has different effects on your body. Some foods slow your metabolism, others quicken it. Yes, the absolute concept is that if your body burns less than you consume, you will gain weight. However, there are so many more factors at work besides the number of calories you are consuming.
If this was not the case, then everyone would have the same metabolism, and every two people that ate the same number of calories would be at the same weight - no exceptions. Obviously, this is not the case, and if you really believe that the variance is only 35 calories, then you must not leave your house very often.
Finally, I'm not angered, because I know why you are really here. It is to find justification that the path you have chosen is acceptable. Well, if you really need that justification, then I'm sure you already know the answer.
Eating problem? I eat just fine and I enjoy every bite. No problem.
A calorie is a calorie. Food gets converted into glycogen which is the storage form of glucose. Unused food gets turned into fat. While a high fat diet will cause some muscle loss it really doesn't matter all that much the source of the calories. If you are at a calories deficit regardless of the foods you are eating body fat gets burned. It is called conservation of mass.
I am not trying to justify being a glutton. I don't need anyone to validate it. I am a glutton and I love it. I am just being honest about it. I am not judging anyone here for being vain. For some people vanity is sanity. I am letting people know that if this doesn't work out for them they need not feel bad and chastise themselves.
I don't think you know what Basal Metabolic Rate is.
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MidgeH
Distinguished Member
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Posted: 22 Sep 2008 06:24 pm |
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BFB, I'm not sure I understand the point you are trying to get across.
You say you are a glutton and you love it - then why are you spending time here in the forums of people who aren't gluttons and loving it and who are trying to build a different kind of life (by the way a life not based on vanity)? You don't want validation from anyone, OK- that seems like a healthy attitude - but then what do you want? How can we help you? (That's what we do here at CPH.)
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cportwine
Distinguished Member
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Posted: 22 Sep 2008 06:29 pm |
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I really don't see any point in this post.....
This forum is for people trying to lose weight not people who want others to accept fat people.
So, I don't see the point in it..... unless you want someone who is trying to give up their dream and not be skinny.
I would not go back to the way I was, mainly for health reason, but also, I feel great, look great....and there is nothing wrong with that.
I worked hard and am proud of myself. And I would think everyone out there in the world would want to experience that in one way or another, even if it doesn't have to do with losing weight.
I really think in order for someone to feel better about themselves is to change ones life or how they live their life, and if that includes dieting, then so be it.
I hardly think giving up on all and being miserable-but yet telling ourselves that we are not, is an option for most people.
And you are right, people will fail and put themselves down. How else with they better themselves with no self control. I think it's all just a bunch of #%@&!, and a big cop out.
I am living proof, that anyone can reach their goal. And I will set new goals and achieve them and just keep going until I am satisfied with the way things are.
It's almost like telling people not to vote. Come on...
Just because someone is losing weight doesn't mean they have a poor self image. Any person should know that. Many of us that do have self image issues, will continue to do so the rest of our lives. It's our personalities, how we are raised, many factors that doesn't even involve weight lose.
Ok, I don't even know what I am saying anymore, I am just going off.....so, I am done with this post... and I won't be checking back in, so don't bother replying to me..
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BFB
Restricted Member
| Joined: | 21 Sep 2008 |
| Location: | USA |
| Posts: | 34 |
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Posted: 22 Sep 2008 08:44 pm |
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MidgeH wrote: BFB, I'm not sure I understand the point you are trying to get across.
You say you are a glutton and you love it - then why are you spending time here in the forums of people who aren't gluttons and loving it and who are trying to build a different kind of life (by the way a life not based on vanity)? You don't want validation from anyone, OK- that seems like a healthy attitude - but then what do you want? How can we help you? (That's what we do here at CPH.)
I am not trying to make to much of a point other than to say that my lifestyle is not for everyone but by the same token neither is a healthy lifestyle. Most Americans choose something closer my lifestyle and 1/3 of them choose a lifestyle very much like mine. I am offering a soft place for people who feel defeated by diet failure. I would like to offer people some peace of mind.
I am not promoting obesity as much as I am promoting gluttony. If there were a pill that would allow me to eat like a glutton and be lean I would probably take it.
I just want dieters to know that there is no such thing as can't and that there is no valid reason for diet failure. I hope that reminding people here of that reality can strengthen their resolve to lose weight if that is indeed what they really want. I also want to provide a safe haven for the quitters and I want them to know that they need not feel bad because they enjoy eating unhealthy food. Gluttony IS good!
Again, I wish all of you the best of luck in your quest to reform your hedonistic ways BUT make sure that is what you really want. There may come a day when something means more to me than food and then I will lose weight.
Thank you for your kind words and concern.
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BFB
Restricted Member
| Joined: | 21 Sep 2008 |
| Location: | USA |
| Posts: | 34 |
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Posted: 22 Sep 2008 09:08 pm |
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cportwine wrote: I really don't see any point in this post.....
This forum is for people trying to lose weight not people who want others to accept fat people.
So, I don't see the point in it..... unless you want someone who is trying to give up their dream and not be skinny.
I would not go back to the way I was, mainly for health reason, but also, I feel great, look great....and there is nothing wrong with that.
I worked hard and am proud of myself. And I would think everyone out there in the world would want to experience that in one way or another, even if it doesn't have to do with losing weight.
I really think in order for someone to feel better about themselves is to change ones life or how they live their life, and if that includes dieting, then so be it.
I hardly think giving up on all and being miserable-but yet telling ourselves that we are not, is an option for most people.
And you are right, people will fail and put themselves down. How else with they better themselves with no self control. I think it's all just a bunch of #%@&!, and a big cop out.
I am living proof, that anyone can reach their goal. And I will set new goals and achieve them and just keep going until I am satisfied with the way things are.
It's almost like telling people not to vote. Come on...
Just because someone is losing weight doesn't mean they have a poor self image. Any person should know that. Many of us that do have self image issues, will continue to do so the rest of our lives. It's our personalities, how we are raised, many factors that doesn't even involve weight lose.
Ok, I don't even know what I am saying anymore, I am just going off.....so, I am done with this post... and I won't be checking back in, so don't bother replying to me..
There is a point to this. Who a person is and what their body is like are two different things. Martin Luther King said not to judge a person by the color of their skin but by the content of their character. The is a difference when it comes to fat people. With a black skinned person you can tell nothing about that person by the color of his skin. This is not true about fat bodied people. We are different. We generally have higher self esteem, we eat a lot more, we are less responsible about our health, we tend to be more selfish and we are gluttons who eat primarily for pleasure and instant gratification. We are food centric.
I am not saying that all dieters have low self esteem. They probably don't. I am saying that if they are dieting thinking being thin will solve all their problems, they will be sadly mistaken. Dieters and lean people probably in many cases are of higher moral character than we gluttons. We know all the selfish and noble reasons to eat responsibly. We are simply too selfish to care. We are no different that 2/3s of Americans in that. The only difference is we admit it.
Here are a bunch of good reasons to lose weight and keep it off but they are not enough for most people.
1. I will be able to do more things.
2. I will live longer.
3. Lower medical bills
4. Better job performance
5. Better sex
6. More attractive to my spouse
7. Less of a burden to my loved ones
8. Won't crush people on public transportation
9. Lower food bill
10. Better for the environment.
Everyone know these reasons but they are not enough for most people.
You said, "I am living proof, that anyone can reach their goal. And I will set new goals and achieve them and just keep going until I am satisfied with the way things are."
Truer words were never spoken. Of course anyone can but the fact is most people don't. It is never a matter of can't. It is always a matter of won't. I applaud you for your inner strength and character.
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DaniMae1
Distinguished Member
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Posted: 23 Sep 2008 08:19 am |
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There may not be any point to this post, but it sure is entertaining! 
Oh, and whoever you are....sometimes we lose weight for more than body image. I started my journey due to knee pain and shortness of breath. So there! 
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christyandmuddy
New Member
| Joined: | 5 May 2008 |
| Location: | Florida USA |
| Posts: | 248 |
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Posted: 23 Sep 2008 12:38 pm |
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So what are you trying to do here? Convince us you're not miserable? Convince us to come along on your road to gluttony? Advertise your blog? Because all I'm seeing here is a desperate, lonely person whose only meaningful relationship in life is with food. No matter what you say, I think that's a sad and miserable way to live. So, good luck with that.
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BEC950
Distinguished Member
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Posted: 23 Sep 2008 01:35 pm |
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I can see both sides of the argument because there have been times in my life where food was more important than my health and I was sick and tired of TRYING to lose weight. I often wondered ?óÔé¼?ôwhy do we have to be thin to be healthy. There are plenty of people who are fat and healthy and happy and plenty of thin people who are unhappy and unhealthy?óÔé¼?Ø. Whenever these types of moral questions enter into contemplation I try to think about how our bodies work and why they were intended to work that way (if that were by god or scientific explanations or whatever you believe).
So here is my opinion on this issue by looking at how nature intended us to work. Let?óÔé¼Ôäós look at animals. How many animals are obese? Animals in the wild eat to survive and humans are the only species as far as I know (correct me if I am wrong but this is what I have heard) that eat for pleasure. Some animals eat to purposefully store fat because they need it for warmth. These animals are not considered ?óÔé¼?ôoverweight?óÔé¼?Ø because they need the fat they carry.
Animals in the wild (and lets not forget where we came from) need to look attractive in order to procreate. They are not ?óÔé¼?ôvain?óÔé¼?Ø as you call us, they just understand survival of the fittest.
I believe that we have an inborn desire to be a healthy weight because deep down we know that we need to be healthy and attractive to survive. The human race has found many ways to overcome these basic instincts by inventing medical procedures to help these who would not have survived in the wild and by accepting some people are fatter and unhealthier than other and that all people are equal. But by accepting that you are overweight and negating any desire to give up certain foods, all you are doing is yet again overwriting your natural instincts to be healthy because it is easier. We are getting lazier as a society but not ?óÔé¼?ôlack of exercise?óÔé¼?Ø laziness but rather ?óÔé¼?ôlets find an excuse to go against what we know if right?óÔé¼?Ø laziness, after all we can argue our way out of anything these days. You BFB are just arguing against a basic survival instinct which I believe is wrong.
The whole purpose in life is to be happy and to do that we must accept that there are things we cannot change. Like the fact that we need to he healthy as a population in order to survive. I am sorry but I just can?óÔé¼Ôäót respect anyone who admits that they are ?óÔé¼?ôtoo selfish to care?óÔé¼?Ø and that readily admits to trying to shift their thinking past what they know is right.
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Javan
Distinguished Member
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Posted: 23 Sep 2008 03:45 pm |
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My partner just send me an email called "Failure". In it were several pictures with the word Failure on them. Each picture showed how the picture was sort of a contradiction of something that should have been good or correct.
two pics that really hit home were timeless.
1st was of a road freshly painted and the painter went out of his way to avoid a tree branch that laid on the edge, such that the white line on the road had a large bend in it.
2nd was that of a woman standing in her front yard, obviously several months pregnant, and SMOKING, yet commenting that the noise of the jackhammers at a nearby construction site may hurt her unborn baby.
Point I am trying to make here is that we can try and fail, or we can fail to try. If a person does not want to try and lead a healthier lifestyle, then fine, have at it. The Twinkie company needs customers, as does the healthfood company.
I will ask a favor and please do not come to a site such as this where people are trying to do something good with their lives and tell them that it is OK to fail and quit.
Most people do not try to fail, they simply fail to try!
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Hellrazor
New Member
| Joined: | 6 Jul 2008 |
| Location: | |
| Posts: | 872 |
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Posted: 23 Sep 2008 04:23 pm |
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BFB has LMEDS (LOVE ME DADDY SYNDROME). He is looking to get a rise out of people in here. He says he is fine with who he is but anyone can say that via the internet. This sounds like someone lacking attention and looking to get it anyway possible. I have achieved many A goal in that past 8-9 months. Such as losing 100lbs, hitting 165lb mark and getting back in the work field.
BFB WROTE
"There may come a day when something means more to me than food and then I will lose weight. "
Yeah and when that day comes for you to loose the weight let's see how you feel when someone tries to break your spirits.
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CrimsonAnimus
Distinguished Member
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Posted: 23 Sep 2008 08:46 pm |
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It is difficult to take this thread at face value. I have, to give the OP the benefit of the doubt (and for other reasons), but part of me really suspects that he is just here to troll.
I do want to comment on the vanity aspect that was mentioned. Here is the official definition of the word "vanity":
Excessive pride in one's appearance, qualities, abilities, achievements, etc.; character or quality of being vain; conceit.
What qualifies as "excessive" is subjective.
For me, I started exercising because I wanted to have more energy for an upcoming trip. Even after the trip was cancelled, though, I kept going.
Why did I keep going? What keeps me going now? I would like to say that it is because I want to be healthier, but I do not believe that the vast majority of people start a weight loss regimen to become healthier. I think that most of us do it because we want to look better, and being healthier is a wonderful side benefit.
Is this vanity? I do not believe so. I just want to look like everybody else - to be considered "normal". I do not want to be looked at with pity when I enter a restaurant. I have no desire to enter a relationship, but I want to know, for myself, that if I were to, I could at least consider myself to be worthy. I am not going to sit here and say "poor me", but growing up, I was often put down for my weight, which formed a definite link between my body image and my self-esteem. For the first time in my life, I actually feel like I am somebody, and I refuse to give up and go back to thinking that I am nobody.
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BFB
Restricted Member
| Joined: | 21 Sep 2008 |
| Location: | USA |
| Posts: | 34 |
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Posted: 5 Oct 2008 03:27 pm |
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CrimsonAnimus wrote: It is difficult to take this thread at face value. I have, to give the OP the benefit of the doubt (and for other reasons), but part of me really suspects that he is just here to troll.
I do want to comment on the vanity aspect that was mentioned. Here is the official definition of the word "vanity":
Excessive pride in one's appearance, qualities, abilities, achievements, etc.; character or quality of being vain; conceit.
What qualifies as "excessive" is subjective.
For me, I started exercising because I wanted to have more energy for an upcoming trip. Even after the trip was cancelled, though, I kept going.
Why did I keep going? What keeps me going now? I would like to say that it is because I want to be healthier, but I do not believe that the vast majority of people start a weight loss regimen to become healthier. I think that most of us do it because we want to look better, and being healthier is a wonderful side benefit.
Is this vanity? I do not believe so. I just want to look like everybody else - to be considered "normal". I do not want to be looked at with pity when I enter a restaurant. I have no desire to enter a relationship, but I want to know, for myself, that if I were to, I could at least consider myself to be worthy. I am not going to sit here and say "poor me", but growing up, I was often put down for my weight, which formed a definite link between my body image and my self-esteem. For the first time in my life, I actually feel like I am somebody, and I refuse to give up and go back to thinking that I am nobody.
You don't need to explain of defend your reasons to anyone for wanting to be fit and eat in a responsible way but by the same token I don't have to defend or explain my gluttonous lifestyle choices.
Worthy? Stop beating yourself up. Does being a fat glutton like me somehow make you unworthy. Fat people have higher self esteem than normal folks. You need to work on the inside. If we cared about how we looked we would eat moderately. We don't eat moderately not because we can't it is because we like food a whole lot.
The fit lifestyle is for the minority and I say more power to you but most people choose and I mean CHOOSE the fat and unhealthy lifestyle. Gluttony wins most of the time.
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BFB
Restricted Member
| Joined: | 21 Sep 2008 |
| Location: | USA |
| Posts: | 34 |
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Posted: 5 Oct 2008 03:40 pm |
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christyandmuddy wrote: So what are you trying to do here? Convince us you're not miserable? Convince us to come along on your road to gluttony? Advertise your blog? Because all I'm seeing here is a desperate, lonely person whose only meaningful relationship in life is with food. No matter what you say, I think that's a sad and miserable way to live. So, good luck with that.
Like most Americans I am an unaplogetic food#%@&!. I am not trying to convince anyone of anything. If you want to be fit good luck.
You are being very judgmental. I have plenty of friends and may of them include Ben and Jerry, Sara Lee, Little Debbie and the Three Musketeers. I have been known to hang out with Jose Cuervo, Captain Morgan and Jim Beam.
I am offering folks a chance to come to my blog and make their case to all my fat readers. Unlike other fat acceptance orgs BFB is NOT anti diet. We remain neutral on weight loss but we are against WLS.
Feel free to comment on my blog. We do not censor. We allow all opinions. All I ask is that you be polite. I even let hateful comment stand because I like to expose fat hatred.
Judge us when you have the full story. OK?Last edited on 5 Oct 2008 04:47 pm by Nir
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Hellrazor
New Member
| Joined: | 6 Jul 2008 |
| Location: | |
| Posts: | 872 |
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Posted: 5 Oct 2008 04:06 pm |
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| So why come to a site where people are looking to try and loose weight . I don't see that as by choice I see more as an addiction to food. Most As you would call them Fat Bodied people have an addiction to food and can't stop. They have other problems that drive them to food. I know I ate cause I was depressed about chronic knee pain. Then one day I woke up and to charge of my life and lost 100 lbs. Anyone can diet and yes most people fail. You have to really wanna do it or you will fail. Thats why I'm here to encourage people not bring them down like you do. So save you BS for some where else umkay
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Nir
Senior Administrator
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Posted: 5 Oct 2008 06:35 pm |
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| Mike, can I please remind you that we have asked you not to link to, mention the name of or otherwise promote your blog due to the sexual references it contains. Do let us know if you are finding it difficult to follow this guideline.
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Straylight
New Member
| Joined: | 25 Sep 2008 |
| Location: | |
| Posts: | 867 |
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Posted: 5 Oct 2008 06:48 pm |
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oh man this post makes me want to go to mcdonald's! Oh my god, i am on my way out the door.... riight.... now!!!!!
:)
(not really)
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CrimsonAnimus
Distinguished Member
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Posted: 5 Oct 2008 09:14 pm |
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BFB wrote:Worthy? Stop beating yourself up. Does being a fat glutton like me somehow make you unworthy.
No, it doesn't make you unworthy. I was merely expressing my own personal feelings on the matter.
However, just because it doesn't make someone "unworthy" doesn't mean that it is "right." By your own acknowledgement, this is a lazy path to failure. Whether you realize it or not, you are encouraging people to fail by promoting this lifestyle, while likewise claiming to wish them success. That is extraordinarily hypocritical.
BFB wrote:
Fat people have higher self esteem than normal folks.
There have many studies linking obesity with low self-esteem. Here are the results of one, titled "Childhood Obesity and Self-Esteem," writted by Richard S. Strauss:
Scholastic and global self-esteem scores were not significantly different among 9- to 10-year old obese and nonobese children. However, over the 4-year period, obese Hispanic females and obese white females showed significantly decreased levels of global self-esteem compared with nonobese Hispanic females and nonobese white females, respectively. Mild decreases in self-esteem also were observed in obese boys compared with nonobese boys. As a result, by 13 to 14 years of age, significantly lower levels of self-esteem were observed in obese boys, obese Hispanic girls, and obese white girls compared with their nonobese counterparts. Decreasing levels of self-esteem in obese children were associated with significantly increased rates of sadness, loneliness, and nervousness compared with obese children whose self-esteem increased or remained unchanged. In addition, obese children with decreasing levels of self-esteem over the 4-year period were more likely to smoke and drink alcohol compared with obese children whose self-esteem increased or remained unchanged.
Whether or not this is due to stigmatization of obesity in society is irrelevant. As humans, we base a portion of our self-worth on the perception of our peers. This is and always has been a universal rule, regardless of cultural influence.
BFB wrote:
The fit lifestyle is for the minority and I say more power to you but most people choose and I mean CHOOSE the fat and unhealthy lifestyle. Gluttony wins most of the time.
It bears to note that the "2/3 majority" you spoke of earlier applies to all overweight Americans, not just obese ones. In actuality, roughly 1/3 of Americans are obese by the same standard, which is not a majority by definition.
Further, the standard used to reach these conclusions is BMI, which, while fairly accurate for the average American, is based solely on height and weight, and as such inevitably causes discrepancies within these statistics.
One more thing, in response to a statement you made earlier:
BFB wrote:
The most a basal metabolic rate can very in individuals or the same weight, age and gender is about 35 calories per day.
There was a study done titled "Serotonin Regulates C. elegans Fat and Feeding Through Independent Molecular Mechanisms," summarized as follows:
We investigated serotonin signaling in C. elegans as a paradigm for neural regulation of energy balance and found that serotonergic regulation of fat is molecularly distinct from feeding regulation. Serotonergic feeding regulation is mediated by receptors whose functions are not required for fat regulation. Serotonergic fat regulation is dependent on a neurally expressed channel and a GPCR that initiate signaling cascades which ultimately promote lipid breakdown at peripheral sites of fat storage. In turn, intermediates of lipid metabolism generated in the periphery modulate feeding behavior. These findings suggest that, as in mammals, C. elegans feeding behavior is regulated by extrinsic and intrinsic cues. Moreover, obesity and thinness are not solely determined by feeding behavior. Rather, feeding behavior and fat metabolism are coordinated but independent responses of the nervous system to the perception of nutrient availability.
If you have not done research on serotonin, it might be prudent for you to do so, seeing as how it is a critical factor in weight regulation. The BMR that you rely so heavily on is a useful tool, but is merely an estimate. It does not factor in bone structure, muscle mass, and perhaps one of the most important factors of all - genetics.
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