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Rachael
New Member
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Posted: 1 Dec 2012 06:58 pm |
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| I am 19 years old and since moving away for college, i have done quite the opposite of fulfilling the freshman 15. The strange thing is, before all of this, i never felt 'fat'. I knew i could stand to lose weight, and yeah i was self concious about my body in certain respects, but i had good friends and a pretty decent life despite the excess weight that clung to my thighs and stomach. I remember when i got my license i lied about my weight saying that i weighed 180. At one point in my high school career i breached the 200 mark, but that may have been a me at my heaviest. I became a vegetarian when i was 16 and dropped 15 pounds after that then gave no more mind to my weight or self image until the past year. Since moving away from home, i went from living in a small town where no where could be reached without driving to a college town where a lot more activity is called for. I lived with my grandparents whose old school style of cooking called for immediate artery clogging, and i really wasn't active at all. I have generally held multiple jobs on top of being a full time student and have been busier then i ever have, so it's not suprising when i started to drop weight. The first ten or fifteen pounds were gradual and really not even anything that drew attention... However now i weigh under 145. So if i assume i weighed around 190 before i moved, i have lost upwards of 40 pounds. I have made no concious efforts to eat healthier, though anything is healthier then the way i ate in high school, i have made minimal efforts to be active, but my activity increased as a result of walking places and being on my feet at work all day. If i reason through the drastic changes in life style, the weight loss seems reasonable, but the aftermath has been incredibly confusing. My friends and family saw no efforts to eat healthier and no gym use, resulting in some concern as to how i dropped so much weight. People first commented in positive ways and I probably enjoyed it more then neccesary, especially added male attention. Now though, i get mostly concern and comments about how i might be too thin. But the thing is, though, i never worried about how i looked when i was over weight, the attention the weight loss drew suddenly has me analyzing my body and focusing on its flaws. The 'too skinny' version of me that my friends mention baffles me. My sister, whose always been my skinny, tall, and blonde counterpart, weighs more then i now do, and i see her and i think the same things about her as always; that she's beautiful and fit, and yet I still think of myself as the plump ginger sister of the prom queen. It never bothered me then, but now it's in the back of my mid everytime i step on a scale. I think i'm more concerned that i don't see myself in the way that others seem to than i am about my weight. In a total realistic and not self depreciating way, i realize that though i have lost weight, i am not in shape. I have zero strength and i think it would serve me well to do more physical activity for the sake of getting into shape and looking at my body in a manner of it's strength and health, rather then the confused image i have now in which i see ribs, hip bones, excess skin, and oddly proportioned thighs in respects to my waiste size. I also think if i made a concious effort to be healthier, not neccesarily to lose any wieght, i wouldn't alarm my friends so much. I seem to have dropped all the weight in my face, ribs, and hips, so i have a little more prominant bone structure and working out would serve to fill my body in a little. I guess my purpose in writing this is that, no matter how much i research things like this, i can't seem to find something tailored to my specific issue. I am not looking in the mirror and seeing myself completely differently then i am, as one would with body dismorhpic tendancies, and i don't have any type of eating disorder that would warrant the concern from my friends. I simply care more about my weight then i use to. I fear gaining it back considering i never did anything conciously to lose it and i worry that i find too much satisfaction in seeing the numbers drop on the scale, even now, but im rational enough not to let that affect my health. I have a family history of body issues, and i've seen it go arry, so it's more the likey im over stressing this, however its a subject i feel a little embarrassment of, so i haven't talked to my friends or family about it.
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Nir
Senior Administrator
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Posted: 2 Dec 2012 01:31 pm |
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"comments about how i might be too thin"
well I would like to know if they are justified (beause in today's society 75% of people are overweight or obsese so they are defining a new "normal" to suit them an make the 25% of people who are a healthy weight feel "less than" - so let us use some objective measurement to see where you are)
At 145lb, I was wondering what your BMI was.
Well you didn't say how tall you were.
At 5'4" it is 24.9
At 5'5" it is 24.1
At 5'8" it is 22.0
At 6' it is 19.7
At 6'2" it is 18.6
"it would serve me well to do more physical activity for the sake of getting into shape and looking at my body in a manner of it's strength and health" I agree that has many health (as well as cosmetic) benefits and everyone who can should be doing some. At 10 hours a week my exercise is a bit on the obsessive side, but on the other hand many bodies recommend 5-7 hours a week as a good amount. No-one is recommening zero.
"no matter how much i research things like this"
if you are looking for a 'meaty' (excuse the pun) resource to sink your teeth into, I would recommend Dr Joel Fuhrman's book "Eat To Live". The focus is on eating for health (and he is fun of exercise, too). The book is available in booksellers and might also be available as a library loan. This month he has made is forum available for free ( you have to go to https://www.drfuhrman.com/events/holiday-challenge/2012/promise.aspx and click "accept the challenge" and then create yourself an account - if you don't want to pay beyond the free period just make up a fake 16-digit credit card number they are not validated )
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fithappens
New Member
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Posted: 12 Apr 2013 10:02 am |
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Rachel, I would not worry about it at all. The comment above me is correct however he can't really give you a woman's perspective while I can.
I was in your exact shoes... the only difference being that I DID care about my excess weight. I was never too big but I come from a large family and ALL of my sisters were tall and blonde and athletic-- while I was the chubby, short, brown-haired one. Even when I TREID to lose weight, they laughed at me because they said it wouldn't work. Finally, I went to college where I didn't have the constant judge-y stares that come along with sisters. I took up Zumba and LOVED it and the pounds melted off-- literally. Because I started to feel better about myself, I WANTED to take care of myself and I began eating healthier, more organic food and less of the #%@&!. I found other forms of exercise that I also enjoyed and when I went home (skinner than ALL of my sisters) everyone commented on the fact that I was "too skinny". I spoke with my doctor about it and she assured me I was a HEALTHY weight for my height and realized that maybe I was just too skinny for their liking. Not that they're bad people or want me to be fat but just that they're used to me being the chubby one and now I'm... well I'm not! I've since continued to manage my weight and moved further into the world of fitness. It started out simply with becoming a Zumba instructor but quickly progressed and I am now going to be opening my own fitness studio in a month and a half!! You can view how awesome it is at FitHappensCNY.com if you'd like-- and when my sisters bring up that I'm "So skinny now" I smile and say thanks.
I'm sure you already know the answer to your problem but simply don't see it because it's your family and friends. You need to put yourself first and realize that (assuming you are also a healthy weight for your height) you're beautiful the way you are. Fat and thin, short or tall, blonde or a "ginger", you are beautiful. You've gotten more attention not because your BODY changed but because your mentality changed. Because your mind changed. Congrats on the weight loss, keep it up and smile when someone says you're too skinny because they're right... you're too skinny for the old you!!
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