| Author | Post |
|---|
MidgeH
Distinguished Member
|
Posted: 26 Dec 2008 01:28 am |
|
I ate my week's worth in the last two days, I should be able to get by on that, right?
That's the plan!
i liked the post, Cindy.
|
MidgeH
Distinguished Member
|
Posted: 26 Dec 2008 01:38 pm |
|
oh, dear god, today I weigh 196. Yikes.
Ok. So there are 2 goal dates for me to work towards. Good, I think I need them. So here are my goals -
1. Weigh 191 by 12/31. 5 lbs is a lot, but my hope is that a pound or two is actually water from 2 days of chinese food and ham. I want to wear a fabulous outfit for new years and not feel whale like.
2. Weigh 189 by 1/10/09. I have a party to go to. Remember the ex-BF who got married about 10 pages ago? He will be there and I haven't seen him since July. He can suck it.
So, veggies, lean protein, eating on a schedule and exercise. That's it. I have to get to a better starting point for the new year, plus I need to get further away from the dreaded number.
Today the thought of eating is just kind of grossing me out. maybe I'll eat a little later, but right now, blech.
|
MidgeH
Distinguished Member
|
Posted: 27 Dec 2008 02:34 pm |
|
195.5 today. pooh. I was hoping for some more water loss.
Tonight i am going out for a holida meal with my best friends. French food. God help me.
|
mollymoo24
Distinguished Member
| Joined: | 30 Dec 2007 |
| Location: | Chicago, USA |
| Posts: | 9953 |
|
Posted: 27 Dec 2008 03:05 pm |
|
Scoobees wrote: MidgeH wrote: I. Am. Never. Eating. Again. Oh. My. God.
Uggghhh, you certainly have company in THAT department.
Merry Christmas Midge!
From,
Blimpy 
You. Two. Crack. Me. Up. 
I actually ate sugar food on Christmas, a scone and a homemake cookie...ugh - no wonder I felt like crud yesterday. Up and at -em girls, time to burn it off!
|
MidgeH
Distinguished Member
|
Posted: 27 Dec 2008 03:31 pm |
|
Yeah, yeah yeah. I know you're right Mol...
Forgot to mention - today I went and bought a fabulous dress for new years. (size 14!) It is so very beautiful. Sparkly, but classy. I wanted to get something wonderful for my date with what might just be my BOYFRIEND. Fancy dinner, music, dancing, champagne - Midge is having her first traditional, how they do it in the movies, NYE.
I'm giving up the 2 others I was working on (figures - 2 with promise came along at the same time) and going with the emotionally available one who seems so very genuine. And very into me. I'm actually pretty terrified of him, but in a good way. He's just so... loving. And talkative. And ready. There are challenges, as I'm sure there are for everyone, not the least of which is me abandoning my baggage and being completely open to him.
At the very least I'm going to give it some time to see what developes.
|
MidgeH
Distinguished Member
|
Posted: 28 Dec 2008 04:15 pm |
|
Holy #%@&!, 197.5 today. Ughhhhhhh!
today is going fine so far though. Had a paoched egg white at breakfast this morning and that is it. then I went shopping and stocked up on veggies and lean protein. If I can have a few days of really healthy 1200 cal eating I think I can get ehse new pounds off, I mean they happened so fast they can't be REAL, right?
Then NYE I'm not going to worry about it, then back on the preverbial horse.
Today my exercise will be, at a minimum tons and tons of housework. The place needs it and it'll keep me moving. If I get enough done I may also do some turbo jam.
So goals for today:
- healthy grocery shopping (done)
- clean kitchen
- organize clothes/laundry
- dust/vaccumn
- home manipedi. Boy is that needed.
Back later for update.
|
CrimsonAnimus
Distinguished Member
|
Posted: 28 Dec 2008 04:39 pm |
|
Midge, I just realized that your "under 200 or bust" quote has been true for quite some time now. 
"Midge, what ARE your plans from here?" *Points mike at Midge's mouth*
You know, I'm going to change my diary quote to that, too. I WILL get there, gosh darnit.
|
MidgeH
Distinguished Member
|
Posted: 28 Dec 2008 06:12 pm |
|
Nick! Good to see you back in my diary!
My plans at the moment are to keep it under 200, if I ever hit that mark again I. Will. Die. And I simply must get under 190. Need a bigger bumper!
|
cportwine
Distinguished Member
|
Posted: 28 Dec 2008 09:58 pm |
|
Ok, quit freaking out.... you keep looking at those numbers. Forget them and eat right and exercise, it will come off. You know it, and I know it. Or at least I hope I know it, cause I got like 5lbs or more to take off myself.
There really should be some law against having new years right after Christmas. Really! that is just wrong.... eat like a pig, then try and be smashing for the new year. WTF! 
|
mj36
New Member
| Joined: | 25 Dec 2008 |
| Location: | |
| Posts: | 1063 |
|
Posted: 28 Dec 2008 10:39 pm |
|
| I am sure you will do well and meet get rid of those pesky extra lbs in time for NYE... but no matter what, go and have a good time... the guy knows what you look like and obviously is happy with that, he asked you out already! Relax and enjoy your new dress (size 14, you can smile about that for the whole night!!).
|
MidgeH
Distinguished Member
|
Posted: 29 Dec 2008 11:27 am |
|
Argh! Lost everything I wrote.
Ok, weight 193.5 today. Praise Jesus.
Still not too hungry today, mostly because of nerves. I have a BF now, which means I have to breakup with someone. Better now than later when we are really attached, but I have never had to do this before so I have real misgivings. Am I doing the right thing, will I regret it, how can I make this a positive experience for him as opposed to a whiney "I'm so sorry!" session for me. It really shouldn't be this hard, but I think the fact that I have 2 strong BF possibilities when I previously (the last 15 years) had 0 scares me. But holding on to #2 is not fair to anyone, and would interfere with anything real ever coming to be with #1.
So it has to be done. Unfortunately I won't get to talk to him until tomorrow. Wish it was over. But at least it has killed my appetite instead of making me binge.
|
cportwine
Distinguished Member
|
Posted: 29 Dec 2008 11:54 am |
|
Yea, nothing like men problems to make you lose your appetite. Unfortunately it works the opposite for me....arg! 
|
MidgeH
Distinguished Member
|
Posted: 29 Dec 2008 03:05 pm |
|
| Just checking back in to say - 800 cals in but we got in a work walk! Felt good, first one in a long time, stupid weather.
|
mj36
New Member
| Joined: | 25 Dec 2008 |
| Location: | |
| Posts: | 1063 |
|
Posted: 29 Dec 2008 09:52 pm |
|
| I hear ya about the weather... it makes it that much harder to brave the outdoors and exercise. Good for you for getting out there. Good luck with your man troubles, hope it all works out for the best~
|
MidgeH
Distinguished Member
|
Posted: 31 Dec 2008 01:14 pm |
|
195 today. How? HOW?!
Argh. Ah, well, Big night tonight. Big date, big meal, drinking. Last hurrah.
Everyone have a great NYE!
|
mollymoo24
Distinguished Member
| Joined: | 30 Dec 2007 |
| Location: | Chicago, USA |
| Posts: | 9953 |
|
Posted: 31 Dec 2008 02:27 pm |
|
Midge, dahling, have a great time tonight. The world is your oyster, babe. 
|
cportwine
Distinguished Member
|
Posted: 31 Dec 2008 05:44 pm |
|
| Have a great time Midge...
|
mj36
New Member
| Joined: | 25 Dec 2008 |
| Location: | |
| Posts: | 1063 |
|
Posted: 31 Dec 2008 07:31 pm |
|
| Enjoy your NYE~ May it meet and exceed all your expectations.
|
Scoobees
Distinguished Member
|
Posted: 31 Dec 2008 08:44 pm |
|
Have a wonderful time Midge!
And tomorrow...Details! We need details!! (only kidding!)
|
MidgeH
Distinguished Member
|
Posted: 2 Jan 2009 12:24 pm |
|
Hi everyone.
Weight today 194. Going in the right direction at least.
NYE was great. Biggest news - I definately have a boyfriend. Yea me! Funny, he is definately not what I would have expect or what people who know me would describe for me. Just goes to show that you need to keep an open mind abut these things and not get caught up in thinking you have a "type". Because apparently I don't.
NYE was glamourous. That dress was amazing and MM (the BF!) seemed to really love it. He's still talking about it.
O/T - If you ready a post where every sentence (addressed to you) ending with ???, how would you react? I had an unsolicited message on a thread come in with ??? after every comment. To me that's insulting, but I may have over reacted. Now a nice person is mad at me. Sigh. Not what I wanted.
So here are some goals for January:
- lose 6 lbs. Little more than my original stated goal, but I desperately need to get out of the 190s and stay there. Rest of year we'll work on the slower weight loss.
- sign up for exercise class at local community college
- organize apartment!
That's good enough. Luckily MM is health conscience so we can work on it together.
Last edited on 2 Jan 2009 12:26 pm by MidgeH
|
cportwine
Distinguished Member
|
Posted: 2 Jan 2009 02:14 pm |
|
That's great about your date, and I am glad you have a bf now. Now you can gripe and bi,tch like the rest of us, lol.
I wouldn't worry about HR. He'll get over it. I find he is sometimes a little to helpful if you know what I mean. 
Sounds like you have a good plan for January. I plan on spending the month trying to decide what I want to accomplish for this year coming. So, I have some serious thinking to do before I decide on my new year resolutions.
Well, keep at it and I will talk to ya soon....
|
mj36
New Member
| Joined: | 25 Dec 2008 |
| Location: | |
| Posts: | 1063 |
|
Posted: 2 Jan 2009 11:29 pm |
|
| I wouldn't worry too much about the posting thing. You have all this great stuff going on (a bf, awesome!) and your own goals, etc... let it go. It's cool that the bf is health conscious and that perhaps you can work toward some of your goals together.
|
mollymoo24
Distinguished Member
| Joined: | 30 Dec 2007 |
| Location: | Chicago, USA |
| Posts: | 9953 |
|
Posted: 3 Jan 2009 12:46 am |
|
| I am glad things are going so well for you. It sounds like a magical evening.
|
MidgeH
Distinguished Member
|
Posted: 4 Jan 2009 05:45 pm |
|
Things are going well. Well, I think they are, I haven't weighed myself in 2 days and I have no intention of doing so until the challenge weigh in on Saturday. Sick of the scale.
I am sitting here in my size 14 ralph lauren jeans that were a little tight when I bought them though. They fit well (and are a little big in the thigh, but that is normal for me.)
Bad news - back to work tomorrow after a fairly magical 2 weeks. Blech.
Good news - back on a more regular schedule makes it easier it eat right.
Here's to making the first real week of 2009 a productive one!
Last edited on 4 Jan 2009 05:47 pm by MidgeH
|
mollymoo24
Distinguished Member
| Joined: | 30 Dec 2007 |
| Location: | Chicago, USA |
| Posts: | 9953 |
|
Posted: 5 Jan 2009 02:15 am |
|
MidgeH wrote: Good news - back on a more regular schedule makes it easier it eat right.
Thanks for pointing that out, that IS something to look forward to. I've been eating entirely too much, being at home all the time.
Congrats on the comfortable 14's. Aren't clothes grand?
|
CrimsonAnimus
Distinguished Member
|
Posted: 5 Jan 2009 10:34 am |
|
Great outlook on the new year, Midge! I just know that 2009 will be a wonderful year for you.
I think it's great, too, that your new dude is health conscious, too. Is he physically active? Maybe you two could find some physical activities that you enjoy doing together, and yes, I'm laughing as I type this, because it just hit me what I'm saying.
Way to go on the new jeans, too! One day, I would love to get into a 28, but alas, I think my hips might prohibit that.
Keep it up, Midgie-pie.
|
cportwine
Distinguished Member
|
Posted: 5 Jan 2009 10:46 am |
|
lol- to funny Nick!
Congrats! on the jeans, Midge......
|
MidgeH
Distinguished Member
|
Posted: 6 Jan 2009 02:59 pm |
|
Yes, Nick, he is - erm... - active. We've talked about doing a number of things when the weather gets warmer.
News Item #1 - I signed up for my deep water aerobics yesterday. Starts 1/26.
New Item #2 - my eating is out of control. God, it's like the holidays woke up the beast. I am at approx 1200 cals today, not all bad cals - some veggies there - but I certainly didn't need that 3 muskateers bar. Or those yummy oily croutons on my salad. Plus the going out - argh!!!
So, taking it one day at a time, here are the goals for the rest of the day:
1. No more eating. I am at my limit.
2. Do TJ tonight.
3. Do some soul searching as to why this is really happening. Especially the fact that I realize that I may be self sabotaging my own happiness. Then give self pat on the back for realizing this is self sabotage and refusing to let it continue.
Update later!
|
cportwine
Distinguished Member
|
Posted: 6 Jan 2009 03:21 pm |
|
I am queen of self sabotaging. So, you need to knock that #%@&! right out of yourself before it takes over....
If you have some trouble with that, I will be over to do for you, lol...jk
Seriously, I hope you get it under control. I tend to spiral out of control when I am into the self sabotaging. So, I am praying for you...
I think the pep talk with yourself is a good idea..... you go and tell yourself off, let yourself know you want to be happy, d.am.it.
Good Luck, Midge....
|
mollymoo24
Distinguished Member
| Joined: | 30 Dec 2007 |
| Location: | Chicago, USA |
| Posts: | 9953 |
|
Posted: 6 Jan 2009 10:27 pm |
|
MidgeH wrote: Especially the fact that I realize that I may be self sabotaging my own happiness. Then give self pat on the back for realizing this is self sabotage and refusing to let it continue.
Way to go!
|
MidgeH
Distinguished Member
|
Posted: 7 Jan 2009 10:33 am |
|
Well, better with the eating yesterday. Far from perfect but much better. Feeling a little less bloated today so that is good.
I'm going to keep a strict count today - that's what CPH is really for right?
Breakfast - eggs (200) and organic fruit thingy (50)
So far so good.
I'm definately starting PMS right now (sorry for the TMI) I'm at the "skin looks terrible and I can't get out of bed in the morning" stage. Paranoia and the incessent talking to myself in my head ("stop it, Midge, It's just pms" type talking) are soon to follow. Sigh. It's 10 days before it's due. But at least it's become predictable.
Going good with MM. It's serious. Given a little bit more time it could become VERY serious. I'm not really sure what I'm doing since I haven't had something serious in nearly 20 years, but even though I realize there are some challenges here it just feels right. I'm just going to flow with it and enjoy it. Pretty frackin' wonderful.
|
MidgeH
Distinguished Member
|
Posted: 7 Jan 2009 04:35 pm |
|
mid afternoon - I am done eating for the day. Not bad, just too early. Sigh. gotta get better with this....
|
cportwine
Distinguished Member
|
Posted: 7 Jan 2009 05:35 pm |
|
| I hear ya! Me too, I was being a pig this morning. I hope I can make through tonight without losing it.
|
mj36
New Member
| Joined: | 25 Dec 2008 |
| Location: | |
| Posts: | 1063 |
|
Posted: 7 Jan 2009 08:49 pm |
|
I'm the complete opposite. I do very well for breakfast, lunch and dinner most days, then lost it around 8 or 9 p.m. As for being out of control, lots of us are in the same boat, paddling along right beside you~ If you are self-sabotaging, it is good to call yourself out on it and be aware. It's cool that you signed up for your water aerobics class, that's a really proactive step.
It's also really cool that you have this great guy in your life. You've worked hard to get where you are today! You should be proud of the good you have done so far, and use that to channel toward more good in the future.
|
zenobia
Distinguished Member
|
Posted: 8 Jan 2009 02:00 am |
|
sounds like 2009 is shaping up to be a good one for ya! it's great to hear and i'm really truly happy for you! love is in the air  
|
OnceUpon-A-ThinGirl
Distinguished Member
|
Posted: 9 Jan 2009 04:07 am |
|
MidgeH wrote: God, it's like the holidays woke up the beast.
I would just like to say, you are not alone (refer to my diary [though please note it is depressing]).
I just can't seem to kick what the holidays have done to my diet. It really is terrible.
|
MidgeH
Distinguished Member
|
Posted: 9 Jan 2009 12:46 pm |
|
Once, we really are in the same boat.
Today I am actually scared. The way I am looking at food, the way I am feeling about it, the way I am eating ... Oh, god, it's Midge circa 281 all over again.
Out of control - or rather, letting food control me - eating when I am definately not hungry, just eating whatever instead of getting whole foods... I am terrified of where I am heading. I do not want to be that girl, I am NOT that girl. Not anymore.
It needs to stop. It must stop. Today I have had toast (OK) and a small danish like thing (not good but not a disaster). I'll have lean protein and veggies for lunch, then I'll be taking MM out to dinner. Gotta be careful there.
Careful, careful, think it through - that should get me back.
I've ate healthy for 8 months and was perfectly happy. What is happening now?
Needs some goals for today. Here they are.
1. Healthy lunch, very light dinner. I can do it.
2. 10 lb wight loss plan. I have to get far away from that 200 mark. I am slowly creeping up on it now (197.5 today) am sick of being terrified of it.
3. Make a list of what I want to do the rest of this month to improve me. The internal and external me. I want an even better makeover in 2009, but I have to do it myself no one will do it for me.
Ok. Here I go. Back to check in later.
|
cportwine
Distinguished Member
|
Posted: 9 Jan 2009 01:16 pm |
|
Midge, I want to suggest something to you. It's the same thing you suggested to Nick. Look back and explore the reasons you wanted to lose weight to begin with. I did that and I also went through some pics and my success story. It really helped as far as the mental part of dieting. Sole searching always helps, right?
So, go did out those fat pictures and reflex for awhile...
|
mollymoo24
Distinguished Member
| Joined: | 30 Dec 2007 |
| Location: | Chicago, USA |
| Posts: | 9953 |
|
Posted: 9 Jan 2009 01:48 pm |
|
Midge, I will tell you what I think and you can tell me to stuff it. You have so much so fast going on right now with MM. I suspect that you are feeling some intense feelings you are not used to managing. I suspect that it is these feelings that are throwing off your eating and you are reverting to the familiar 'safe zone' of the old Midge with your eating habits.
Anyway you are smart enough to see it and to challenge yourself. I am wishing you a good day today and sending you my support. : )
|
MidgeH
Distinguished Member
|
Posted: 9 Jan 2009 02:07 pm |
|
Thanks Mol and I think you are right. In the last few weeks my life has taken a complete u turn and I'm not sure, emotionally, what to do with myself. Very perceptive of you.
So many changes, so little analysis by me - not good. So I'm changing that.
Food update - small piece backed chicken breast, broccoli, carrots, a little promise on them. Approx 310 cals.
Ahhhh. See, that's what a meal is supposed to feel like. You know that feeling - like vitimins and other healthy stuff you need is coursing through you. You don't feel bloated, you aren't fretting about it, it just feels like you did something positive for your well being.
This is the feeling I want all the time. This is the feeling I gave myself for months by eating lots of veg, lots of lean protein and a few healthy fats. And, yes, the occasional treat that was extra good because I had it so infrequently. I need to get back to that, lose some more weight, then rethink the maintaining program.
Oh, one thing I noticed about the loss - on NYE my picture was taken and I look OK, but I am definately getting that "she obviously has lost a lot of weight" look. Especially in the face. you know what I mean. I'll post the pic when I can.
Anyway - I refuse to look like that - just awful. So it's back to the idea of getting away from 200 (to at least 188 or maybe around 185) then barely losing any. I'm Ok with being plump (and, honestly, turns out other people like it to ) but I refuse to have body parts that flap in the breeze.
more thinking to do, but I am feeling a little better after that right-track meal...
Last edited on 9 Jan 2009 02:09 pm by MidgeH
|
OnceUpon-A-ThinGirl
Distinguished Member
|
Posted: 9 Jan 2009 03:10 pm |
|
MidgeH wrote: but I refuse to have body parts that flap in the breeze.
This cracks me up!
But honestly I do have that problem, lol!!!
|
MidgeH
Distinguished Member
|
Posted: 9 Jan 2009 05:07 pm |
|
Just a quick food update for today: Snack of 100 cal bag of popcorn puts me at 760 for the day, leaving 440 - 740 left for dinner tonight. Not so bad. So I can eat somethig and still be at deficit for the day.
Better!
|
cportwine
Distinguished Member
|
Posted: 9 Jan 2009 05:25 pm |
|
That's great Midge! Keep at it... 
|
mj36
New Member
| Joined: | 25 Dec 2008 |
| Location: | |
| Posts: | 1063 |
|
Posted: 9 Jan 2009 07:43 pm |
|
So you don't think loose arm skin or flabby legs look good in a breeze? You crush me haha! Anyway, glad to hear that you are evaluating your reasons for being off track, and that you now have some healthy vitamins and minerals coursing through your veins from that picture perfect diet lunch. You go girl!
As for the "she lost a lot of weight" look... when I went from 234 lbs to 143 lbs (ummm, that was before I got back to the 170's, thank you very much), my friend said she couldn't get used to it and that to her, I looked like one of those Bratz dolls... with the big heads... and the little bodies... that image sticks with me still, and I crack up! I know exactly what you mean. LOL~
|
MidgeH
Distinguished Member
|
Posted: 11 Jan 2009 07:40 pm |
|
Weekend ap up - not bad not good. Could have been a lot worse, but by no means good. But it's over and i have stocked up on lean cuisines and lots of salad stuff. Back to the beginning folks!
In food related news that chicken chili i made was GOOD. Very good. MM loved it. I put the recipe in the recipe section.
Time is becoming an issue. Now that I;m in a relationship I can finally relate to the time crunch you guys are always talking about!
But I'm feelin OK. Doin Ok, this week is going to be AWESOME. I;m going to make sure of it.
|
mj36
New Member
| Joined: | 25 Dec 2008 |
| Location: | |
| Posts: | 1063 |
|
Posted: 11 Jan 2009 08:50 pm |
|
| Hey, Midge, I love the can-do attitude! You'll fit it all in somehow. Any chance of getting yur guy to work out with you?
|
MidgeH
Distinguished Member
|
Posted: 12 Jan 2009 12:42 am |
|
Any chance of getting yur guy to work out with you?
Well, since you asked... bwahahahahahaha! I;m sure that's not what you meant, but we're getting plenty of exercise. HAHAHAHA.
Actually we have discussed working out together. i think we will be, just have to get there...
|
mj36
New Member
| Joined: | 25 Dec 2008 |
| Location: | |
| Posts: | 1063 |
|
Posted: 12 Jan 2009 10:22 am |
|
| OK, didn't think about how that might sound haha... that kind of working out is good, but the other kind would be great too! It's cool that you feel comfortable enough with him to share the weight loss journey and to try to development an exercise routine (like WALKING) that you both can enjoy.
|
MidgeH
Distinguished Member
|
Posted: 12 Jan 2009 04:37 pm |
|
Lord, I feel so out of control. Argh. gotta get ahold of myself, need to recapture that fire I had a few months ago. Where is it? How did I do it?
Why is this happening now? Is it because things are going well? I thought I was self sabotaging, but do I really hate myself THIS much?
Within a hair of being able to grab what I want - good health, beauty, great guy, a life built with someone - and I am screwing it up? What is WRONG with me.
Lots to think about, but I am just so unsure of what I am doing right now. But I am on a precipice - I could go either way. Back up, reevaluate and take another path or jump off and crash into the ground below.
What will i choose? Stay tuned...
|
cportwine
Distinguished Member
|
Posted: 12 Jan 2009 04:52 pm |
|
Gee Midge your starting to sound like this book I am reading. Keep this up and I will be demanding more entries just so I have something to read.
I tend to gain weight when I am all content and what not. So, maybe it's because you are with this guy and all happy. Your not focusing on yourself anymore. You just need to be more attentive to yourself.
|
|
|
